An Italian Kiss For Kilroy – Plus Bonus Content!

In this post, everything is by mom - the photos, the watercolor, and all the words...

When I was 72 I finally realized a long time dream. I spent a month on back to back trips to Italy and Sicily. I had just learned that in addition to all my Celtic roots, my great grandmother had come from Sicily. That meant I was not only a feisty Mick but also a little bit dangerous. We started out doing a full circle of Italy beginning in Rome. The first night we had an introduction to meet our tour mates and hear from our guide. Tall, silver haired, and the handsomest man ever seen outside the silver screen. I figured he was about ten years younger than I was. I hadn’t come looking for romance and I had no illusions that he was going to be interested in me. I had never had any confidence in my ability to attract men but I was confident that I could achieve an impossible goal. I decided that before the trip was over Riccardo was going to know that Kilroy had been there. If you don’t know who Kilroy was, ask your Grandfather.

The tour was well planned and beautifully organized by European Tours out of Oswego Oregon.  I wasn’t obvious. I didn’t bat my eyelashes, show skin or make suggestive remarks. I just bided my time. He was not allowed to mix with the group so disappeared after getting us settled at each stop. Italy was fabulous and the food was fantastic. The first night the group didn’t look very interesting but before the trip was over I was in love with all of them. It always pays to get to know people before making judgments.  But you knew that.

Some nights I ate with the women on the tour and some nights I ate with the couples. I did not want to be seen as belonging to any group. If Riccardo paid any attention to me at all he had to notice that I was friendly with everyone. A positive impression. One night, after dinner, we were all standing on the sidewalk waiting for our bus. I instantly knew it was my chance. No guts no glory. Riccardo had just told us that in high school he and two of his friends would surround a girl and tell her that she had to kiss one of them before they would let her go. I said “”I want an Italian kiss”. Everybody laughed, of course. He put his hands on my shoulders and said to the group, “She doesn’t know what an Italian kiss is.” This time only the men laughed. I suspect the women were wondering why they hadn’t thought of it. I said “No. I mean ---,” and pointed to both cheeks. He kissed me on both cheeks. Round one.

During our tour of Rome we had had a beautiful blonde woman tour guide showing us around the city. She and Riccardo were obviously good friends. A new idea began to form in my imagination. I would write a movie treatment starring those two. It looked like perfect casting. Rossano Brazzi and Virna Lisi.  One afternoon at our beautiful hotel in Sorrento, I sat out on the balcony and wrote the story in about an hour and a half. We had just spent a day on Capri and I decided that that had to be the setting. Riccardo had indicated that he was unhappily married, so while on Capri some of the other women and I sat in an outdoor café drinking cappuccinos and trying to choose a future wife for him among the tourists walking by. I guess we expected to see Jacqueline Kennedy but she didn’t come and none of the other tourists looked worthy. Still, a pleasant way to spend the afternoon. I know, Italians only drink cappuccino in the morning. Don’t care. It was too tasty.

I will relate my movie story later. One afternoon, in the lobby of the hotel in Taormina I ran into Riccardo. I told him about the story I had written and said it was about him and the tour guide in Rome. I outlined the story to him. I think for a moment he thought maybe I was a Hollywood writer but I quickly assured him I wasn’t and it was just a spur of the moment thing. 

On the last day, we were in a hotel outside Rome. He and the others were leaving to back to Rome and the group would fly home.  I was to wait until later and take a cab into town and get ready for my Sicily tour and a new guide. I went out to the parking lot to say goodbye to everyone and Riccardo was out there on the other side of the bus waiting for the people to come. I started to give him a hug but he grabbed me and gave a real kiss. Bingo! He said if he could he would come back after he saw everyone else off.  That sounded interesting but whatever he meant, it wasn’t my intention to wait and see. As the bus pulled out I jumped around the parking lot like a crazy woman waving goodbye. I then called a cab, and went to my hotel in Rome to wait for the next tour. Long live Kilroy.

The Sicilian guide was very charming but he was not Riccardo. The first night at our new hotel in Naples, after he handed us out keys, everyone was leaving and he said to me, “Madame,” meaning me, and he came up and kissed me on both cheeks. Oh damn! Where did he get that idea?

BONUS CONTENT!!

The Movie Story.

A brief outline of the kind of movie I enjoy seeing. Beautiful people in gorgeous clothes, living in great houses, in great surroundings. But it is also a bit of a satire of the private lives of the European rich.

When I told Riccardo that he had inspired me to write a movie  using him and the Rome guide who looked like Monica Viti, he said he had written a story called ‘Siesta Time‘. I didn’t know if he was kidding but I said “I am going to call my story ‘Siesta Time’ too. He asked me what I was going to do with it and I said I was going to let my sons read it and they would tell me it was stupid and I would stick it away in my writing cupboard with all my other stupid stuff.

“Siesta Time”

Setting: A villa surrounded by a gorgeous garden, set high on a cliff on Capri, looking over The Bay of Naples.

Dramatis Personae:

Riccardo played by Rosanno Brazzi. a very rich, retired businessman

Monica played by Monica Viti.  Riccardo’s wife. Inspired by our Rome guide.

Juliette:  the daughter, played by Amanda Seyfried

Romeo, the head gardener’s son , inspired by our guide on Capri, played by some tall, dark and handsome young Italian actor.

Raf, Monica’s lover, inspired by our guide in Pompeii., played by a younger Raf Valone.

Laize Kent : Riccardo’s great love, played by Angelina Jolie..

Of course all actor’s ages adjusted accordingly to fit the characters.

Rosanno and Monica have been married for 20 years. They live in a villa high up on a cliff on overlooking the Bay of Naples.. They have a beautiful 18 year old daughter named Juliette, the apple of her father’s eye. Riccardo and his wife have not been lovers for the past five years but remain friends. Every Wednesday Monica and her personal driver, Giuseppi, drive to Napoli where she spends the night with her lover Raf. On the way over, she and Giuseppi stop in Sorrento for a little siesta time. Also, on the way back. Over the years Ricardo has been involved with several women and currently is having a lusterless affair with the wife of the President of France. But Riccardo has reached a crises point in his life He acquired his money through inheritance and hard work when he was young and has had many years to enjoy the fruits of his labor and investments. He is bored. He has no new challenges in his life. His many enterprises are skillfully handled by lawyers, accountants and trusted managers. If it weren’t for his daughter and the villa there would be no joy in his life. But Juliette had been away at school for several years. Finally she graduated and has come home. Romeo, the son of the head gardener has also been away at college where he studied the science of agriculture. He expects to take his father’s place some day as head gardener.. He and Juliette have known each other since they were children but now they meet as grownups. Juliette makes sure they meet every day at siesta time in one of the secluded garden areas. They fall desperately in love but Riccardo is furious. This is not what he planned for his precious daughter. The young lovers run far away from him to an ashram in India. Riccardo was so angry he disowns her and vows never to see her again. Monica is more understanding and in the years to come visits them often and sends gifts of money. Monica begins to travel more and more, always with Raf and Giuseppe by her side. Her jet set friends see this as quite normal. One day Riccardo hears that Bill Gates, his wife and a party of 25 are on a yacht moored on the back side of Capri. He invited them all to lunch at the villa. Among the group is a beautiful Eurasian woman, about 35, named Laize Kent. She is Chinese, Portugese, English and Hawaiian. They fall immediately in love and she rents a villa at Anacapri so they can be together. She is so kind, kind, clever, loving and intelligent that she ruins him for other women but inspires him to return to work. And he develops an inexpensive way of using fusion which solves the energy problems of the world. At the end of five years she is murdered by ninjas hired by a Japanese consortium Rosanno had once bested in a business deal. They knew this would hurt him the most. He goes into a severe depression. He starts drinking. Not even the villa can make him happy. But he is a strong man with a great depth of character and after awhile he knows he cannot go on like this. He decides to go to India on a spiritual search and find Romeo and Juliette, ask their forgiveness.  Romeo is now working for the Indian department of agriculture, they have two children and Juliette teaches Italian at a private girl’s school. He brings them back to the villa. He is now a relatively happy man. Laize is dead, Monica is gone but he has Juliette and the grandchildren and Romeo is happy to manage the affairs of the villa. Every afternoon Riccardo goes to Madame Pompeii’s for chianti and warmth

FINI

-Jean Clarice Walsh